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If you want to influence the action of others, you need to study the process others go through when they truly consider change. Within that process is one, crucial decision point that is an Achilles heel for so many of us. In this Pocket Sized Pep Talk, I tell you exactly what it is and why it desperately deserves our attention when we sell.

Originally Published: January 4, 2023

Rob Jolles (0:00):

If you want to influence the action of others, you need to study the process others go through when they consider change. Now, within that process is one crucial decision point that is the Achilles heel for so many of us. Let’s have ourselves in pocket size pep talk, and I’ll tell you exactly what it is and why it desperately deserves our attention. 

Introduction (0:26):

A pocket-sized pep talk, the podcast that can help energize your business and your life with a quick inspiring message. Now, here’s your host, Rob Jolles. 

Rob Jolles (0:38):

Some years ago, my wife and I owned a Mercury Marquis. That was one interesting piece of work. It was a fine car, but we had it for quite some time, and over the years it developed some rather interesting habits. It had a rattle of some sort in the back wheel, but we got used to it. The dashboard light had a mind of its own and would come on and off with its own schedule, but we got used to it and had a ding here and there and some rust over there and here, and well, the mileage wasn’t quite what we had in mind, but we got used to it. In fact, there were a lot of nagging issues with this car, and we mumbled from time to time that we should probably get rid of it, but that was just idle chatter. Then one day the car surprised us with a new interesting habit. 

Rob Jolles(01:34):

Early one morning, we drove to a friend’s house in a quiet little suburban neighborhood in Maryland, and as we turned into the neighborhood, the horn went off all by itself. As soon as we completed our turn and in the neighborhood, the horn stopped mortified. We continued on a couple of blocks. Later we turned again and again. The horn with a parent mind of his own went off quickly. We completed the turn and it stopped again. As luck would have it, we had to make at least four more turns and each turn we took that horn, let all within earshot know we were on their street. When we finally reached our friend’s house and announced our arrival to the dozens of neighbors, we no doubt woke up. We were clear on two things. First, we needed to cut the wire to that car horn, and second, we needed to say goodbye to this car. 

Rob Jolles(02:33):

We had crossed that line in the sand between not liking something and deciding to do something about it. We had made a commitment to change. When it comes to making decisions, it’s clear that we go through repeatable, predictable stages. However, within this cycle, there’s one significant moment of truth that seems to be missed by many, and yet is vital to those who seek to change minds. In a sense, it represents a line in the sand. I’m in no way a cynic, but I’m a realist. These two things I know to be true. One, it’s human nature to spend months, if not years living with problems we’re capable of fixing, but we just don’t. We wait until these problems become big problems and change often comes too late, who? It’s human nature to fear change, and that fear of change can be so blinding that we can’t see the size and scope of problems until there’s a difficult if not devastating scenario. 

Rob Jolles(03:49):

We live with these problems. We justify these problems. We whine about these problems, we sulk about these problems. We turn away and we even deny these problems exist, and then something happens. That something can be as simple as a comment that catches us by surprise, and other times it can be as lethal as a firing at work, but something happens. And when that something happens, we cross a line. I’ve nicknamed the “fix don’t fix” line, and in a sense, it’s a mythical line in the sand. When we cross that line, we don’t commit to a solution. We commit to change. We can complain about an unfulfilling job for years, we’ve crossed that line in the sand. When we have a resume redone and begin networking, we can complain about an unfulfilling relationship. For years, we’ve crossed that line in the sand. When we find ourselves with a therapist and set an appointment, we can complain about a car that has too many miles on it. 

Rob Jolles(05:01):

We’ve crossed the line in the sand when we find ourselves pulling into a dealership. These are moments of truth. There are moments of truth in all our lives. These moments of truth frequently initiate change. Personally, I’d rather help someone avoid a catastrophe than help someone clean one up, and that’s why this line of sand is so important to me. Understanding this line helps to remind me how important it’s to help others navigate this line. It’s not unusual to struggle with change. We all do. What is unusual is for people on their own to fix these problems before it’s too late. 

Rob Jolles(05:54):

Thanks so much for listening. If you enjoyed today’s show, please rate and recommend it on iTunes, outcasts, wherever you get your podcast. You can also get more information on this show and rob@jellos.com.